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Friday, May 21, 2010

3 Possible Ways to Get Your Husband Back From the Other Woman

One of your innermost fears had happened. Despite your efforts to make your marriage work, he still felt unsatisfied and left with you for another woman. He was your soul mate, your best friend, your everything, and now with him gone, it is difficult to start all over again by yourself.

These 3 quick steps will help you in your goal:
 1.    Do not bombard him with text messages or calls. Yes, he had left and you miss him terribly. Now what? Your initial reaction is that you want to contact him. For what? Right now, in this kind of situation, no amount of pleas in your texts or calls will make him come back, so better not do such. Just give him time and space, even if it hurts. Make him miss you. In due time, he will see the flaws of his lover and compare her to you.

2.    Focus on improving yourself. There must be a negative reason or two why he left. Reflect on it. Do you still dress up and carry yourself like when you were still dating? Do you still act the way you feel? Yes, you have always loved him, but have you been showing him and making him feel that love prior to leaving? Make a list of your negative aspects, as well as the positive. Change the negative ones, and improve on the negatives. Be strong.

3.    Think positive. Your husband fell in love with you, that was why he married you. Program your heart and mind that no other woman can compare to you. He is just infatuated with her. His love for you is still there, but overpowered by physical attraction towards her that will surely go away.  --ARV

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

What Really is Love?

Many say that love is eternal, is sweet, kind, thoughtful, etc. It is this and that. It is not this, nor that. It should be this and/or that. Crazy as it may seem to many, still quite a handful say those three sweet words easily.  But do they really mean it, especially that many people do not really know about it?

Deep inside, does anybody know what love really is?

Most of the people claiming to know or have known love describe it superficially, only at the physical level. Only at the point they can decipher instantly. They do not delve deeper, right smack into the heart and soul, where love really should come from.

Nobody is quite an expert to clearly fathom this four-letter word. They just attach its supposed meaning to how they feel at the moment, most especially towards somebody of the opposite sex.

Even if there really is not any single person who can clearly and in detail or in black and white, say what love is, many people can pitch in and give insights. Like a crossword or jigsaw puzzle or connect-the-dots, these different opinions and facts from different people will eventually lead to a concrete conclusion as to what love really is.

Two heads are always better than one. And in connection to this, the most reliable ones are those who have strong attachment, care, and affection towards other persons, and are not expecting something in return. But even if most of them are actually expecting something in return, what they feel toward the concerned people is still love.

To sum up what they say, love always involves another being, and it really is:
• a strong feeling
• tender care
• physical and emotional attraction
• concern
• thoughtfulness
• an inspiration

On the other hand, this same love has different kinds and levels. It can be felt towards:
• people not blood-related
• children
• parents
• friends
• other relatives
• pets
Whatever the reason/s, whoever the involved people are, and wherever they may be, love is basically the same even though it has been evolving generation by generation.

So, what really is love? It is that wonderful feeling that many experience, and they just know that it is love. They simply just know it by instinct. And it is this the love that keeps them alive and kicking. --ARV

Monday, May 17, 2010

Life Begins at 40

I just turned forty, but honestly, I do not feel old. In fact, I think it is only the physical aspect that has been rapidly changing, but the mental one has not changed except in terms of maturity level. 

Twenty years ago, I thought that being 40 was scary, and already that old. Here I am, already 40 but there is nothing scary about it.
The years just whizzed so quickly that there were instances before that I would actually forget what my exact age was, and I would need to compute it by subtracting my birth year from the present year.
Now that I am in the so-called middle age, halfway through my life (I hope so), I just simply want to be happy.  --ARV

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Mother's Day

Each one of us would not have been here if not for our respective mothers who conceived us and brought us into this world. Then they reared us and made sure that we had the best. They have always been hard-working even during off-hours, just to ensure that we would be well-taken-cared of.

Motherhood cannot be compared to any career or job because unlike the latter, it does not require
payment for its services, does not have a day-off, and the ‘duty’ is round-the-clock’. Indeed, with all its
 sacrifices, motherhood is a very noble state that is worthy of acknowledgments especially on the day reserved especially for it.

Mother’s Day is intended for everyone to celebrate and remember the many angles of motherhood. Mothers should be showered with love, respect, and kindness the whole year through, but it is during this day that we highlight such by giving them tangible things like flowers, chocolates, cakes, greeting cards, etc., and/or intangible ones like extra care, affection, and attention.

How did this special day come about? Its history dates back centuries ago in ancient Greece where they honored Rhea, the gods’ mother. Also, in the 1600’s, English Christians allotted a day to honor the Virgin Mary, Jesus Christ’s mother. Then it later included all the mothers. Thus, a religious decree ordered the holiday, naming it as Mothering Sunday In modern times, it is celebrated on the second Sunday of May       
Truly, all mothers need to be exalted to the highest level even for just a day. Gifts for her need not be store-bought; home-made ones are equally precious. But the most important things to give them on their distinct day are feelings, centered on love, that come straight from our hearts. No other gift, no matter how expensive, can surpass these. --ARV

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Awkward Run-in with an Ex

Right after breaking up with a partner, the innocent party’s world seems to be on a halt. This is especially so if quite a chunk of his/her life has been devoted to that relationship. Questions pertaining to what went wrong, what could he/she has done to end everything like this, and/or can this still be saved start seeping into the mind and senses.

The days following such a breakup seem blank and useless. Family and friends are there for comfort, but every period alone seems worse than death itself. Then, weird thoughts, including suicidal ones, creep.into the system. Good thing that there is still a sensible part which gives the much-needed strength and will to move on.

Though not easy, getting over a recent breakup is possible. The world is so beautiful to give up too soon. Well, just as when things start to get normal again, the aggrieved party accidentally bumps with the ex. Suddenly, it is realized that there are still affections stuck in limbo. Oh, no. The surroundings seem to fade; running away is too late because he/she is fast approaching!  What should be done in this case?

Firstly, a sincere smile and greeting are sufficient. There is no reason for snobbery. There were also happy times spent with him/her, anyway. Secondly, a little exchange of pleasantries is fine. But, of course, nonverbal signals  must be observed. If the ex looks unreceptive, then it is time to exit. Lastly, a friendly goodbye is enough to wipe off any residue from the parting.

But if the ex is together with a new partner, that is another story. However, just the same, the most important thing to do is to smile, greet, and say goodbye sincerely. There should be no more expecting for sparks. That breakup should have been sufficient to end that chapter in life. --ARV

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Why Cannot Real-life Love Stories be Like Fairy Tales?

Most kids grow up with fairy tales as their favorite book topic. They are very fascinated with the featured princes, princesses, heroes, heroines, among other characters. In addition, they love happy endings wherein the two major characters end up marrying each other.

To many couples these days, that is what marriage really is: a fairy tale. The harsh realities of life in the real world make such so. Well, partly, marriage is comparable to that featured in a fairy tale, at least the wedding part. But unlike it, a real-life marriage does not always end up happily ever after. Of course, some unions actually end up happily ever after, but most do not. Many end up ever after, but not happily.

Many factors, usually personal, affect the stability of a married couple’s union. Then there are the internal and external reasons. Often, both spouses do their individual responsibilities and duties, but uncontrollable forces mar their partnership. And, if they are not strong enough, their marriage collapses.

So, why cannot real-life love stories be like fairy tales? The reason is actually simple yet unfathomable. Simple because reality is far different from fiction, which fairy tales are made of. Unfathomable because that is what the essence of life is all about.

When two people of different personalities, backgrounds, and upbringing enter into marriage, they are somewhat taking a plunge into the unknown, with love as their main shield for any dragon or monster that may attack. Some couples are successful in beating any obstacle in their journey, while some are not. The former end up being together for the rest of their lives while the latter do not.

No two sets of couples are exactly alike. And, it is not proper to judge their respective marriages. Actually, it is not proper to judge anything. But, even if this is so, the question above continues to be asked, with such couples in mind.  -- ARV

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